Yes this post is about the special person.  I wanted to blog for a long time but I was waiting for something really worthy to type on. So what makes my father a special person in my life.. Its hard for anyone to narrate how great someone was, even if you explain it in words it always looks less of a value. But let me try my best!

Lets back on to 1st april 1953, my dad was born in a small village in Pudukkottai district as fourth child to a beautiful couple. In olden days its very usual for most of the Indian families to have 5-10 children or even more.   My dad had his schooling in the same village with all his siblings.   By the time when my father went for high school his elder sister got married and two of his elder brothers had already started their university education. It was a real tough time for the family of a lower middle class status. My grandpa being an unsuccessful farmer had hard time to make the ends meet.

After my father completed his high school understanding the situation of the family he went to work in a local financing shop for a brief period. But it was my grandpa insisted him to take up PUC – Pre University Course  (which would be the current higher secondary education). My grandpa having no education himself knew the real importance of what education can do.  So even though having a tough time he sent my dad to study further in Madurai.  After finishing PUC my dad joined for B.A economics at “Arumugam Pillai Seethai Ammal College” in Tiruppattur.  My fathers home town was like 12 kilometers from Tiruppattur.  All through his college years he just used a good old cycle to commute to and fro 24 kms a day to his college. Once when he completed his degree he had to go through another round of  hardship. During 70’s and 80’s there were not much private firms, only a considerable amount of government jobs. But getting in to a government job is not that easy, being labelled as “OC” (Other Category) he had much less opportunities when compared with his peers ( I wish the government had a creamy layer for OC). It took nearly two years for him to find a job as a clerk in one of the upcoming banks at that time – IOB (Indian Overseas Bank).  When my father got his job he was keen on paying up the family loans. My grandma always says with proud that my father just keeps a mere amount for his personal expense and gives all the rest to her. And later on my father married my mom on 1980 and they had two baby boys on 1981, 1987 respectively 🙂

Now you can ask, this is an ordinary story of any individual in the 70’s or 80’s.  So how can he be special to me? ..Well I am coming there..!!! I was a mediocre student until my 10th grade scoring around 70% of marks. (Oh yet another story?? Don’t worry.. I will make it brief :)). When I decided drop higher secondary and go to a polytechnic university my father sat with me and gave some valuable advice on life (which was like teaching hindi to me – I never understood anything).  He just explained me the hardships that he went on and what are the challenges that I could face in my life. Well like any other son I promptly disagreed to what he said. But anyhow we came to an agreement that I will give higher secondary school a shot and if nothing works on, my father has to leave me on my way.

Here comes another short story, when I was a tiny tot my father taught me how to play chess. I think it was my second/third grade, we spend all our weekends playing chess and my father loses all the game just make me happy and bring on more interest in me towards the game. So during my 11th grade my dad encouraged me to participate in all the district and state level competitions hoping that it could bring me in much needed confidence… and yes it did. To explain myself I was a better positional player than a tactical player in chess. Although most people prefer tactical play since it is much of an attacking style and depends upon a lot of mental calculation I loved positional play which is of much defensive and you give your opponent enormous pressure by blocking all his advances (anyhow you need a little tactical blow to end the game). I bagged up lot of cups, certificates, money and much needed **confidence**. But it was not too late when I realized that my dad didn’t actually teach me chess to play it as a game but he wanted me to incorporate it in my life. I started concentrating on my own life. I found the areas where I am weak in education. I asked him to give me a separate room where I can be away from all the distractions, a moped to save much cycling time, a Stereo to relax myself, best tutors in the city who can teach me in a way that I can understand. I really used all my morning hours effectively and I never missed any test in my school life. I scored around 94% in my 12th and 81% on my entrance exam. Lol 🙂 .. no one in my family believed me when I said the result including my mom.. Its only my dad who had the real smile. At that point I decided to study much more until I feel its enough. I joined one of the best engineering colleges in Tamil Nadu, I thought things had changed in me.. But unfortunately my new college didn’t work out for me, may be I am so lame to study, may be there were so many things to distract me or the lecturers were not so good to teach things in a way which I can understand.  Although those 4 years taught me a lot of valuable things in my life honestly speaking.

Then I came to USA to pursue masters after hearing from my brother about the education system here. I got an admit to one of the top 50 universities in US. It was only in my masters where I learnt much about computers and programming. Although I went through lot of hardships like economic recession, unemployment and much more things.. I always clanged to the idea of living life like a chess.  I tried different ways, took many risks, always manipulated my future in advance and here I am living the so called “American” life.

I did nothing, its all him. When I look back my life I haven’t done anything without my father backing me up (or) guiding me through. My dad’s life taught me the responsibility, his teachings guided me all through my life  and finally his support took me to the peak of success.  I could never repay this debt to my father. I am so thankful to him. He will be special to me always !!!

One day I will show this post to my kids and tell them how lucky we are to have him in our life! Love you daddy! Always!


I came across this real touching documentary.. It was a short documentary named “Chicken a la carte” (looking weird ??? you will understand the meaning at the end 😦 ) by Ferdinand Dimadura. It was selected as the best short film for the year 2006 at the Berlin Film Festival.. Out of 3600 Filmmaker’s nominations this short film was selected as the best one.
I will leave it to you to figure out the reason why

How can someones’ laughter brings me to tears?

            [Disclaimer:  If you are a religious fanatic, skip this post!]

  Few months before, I had an opportunity to have lunch with one of my brother’s senior colleague.  He (my brother’s colleague) was quite old when it comes to age but not in appearance. He was lot much interested about India and Indian cuisines. He was a strong believer of Christianity and its principles. During a conversation, he asked me about my  religious beliefs. I said I have beliefs but not religious. He asked me “what do you think about life after death. where will we be ?”. I replied “It will be just like what was before our birth. no existence” 🙂 ..He said that he was a communicator for God and there is a superpower still existing in this universe. I blamed that its his multiple split personality. He said that “Jesus” is the only God and the bible bears the testimony. I asked him “What religion you would be, if you were born 2010 years ago?”. He said that “Christianity is the ever growing religion and you cannot compare it with other religions”. I replied that “Once up on a time Greeks, Norwegians, Egyptians believed in some God, but now its just a mythology”.  And this conversation went on such a way that I have to give up my stand at one instance just for courtesy & I do know that arguments never end up in results but in rivalry. Moreover I thought I was bit rude &  more dominant and I hate to mock others beliefs. Later he presented me a famous book on life after death – “One Heart beat away” by “Mark Cahill”.  (I read some pages of it, but felt it was completely illogical,  I stopped it then!)  

At the end of the party I invited him to come to India atleast once. His reply stunned me. He said that, there was no safety for Christians and foreigners in India & he might be deciding on that in future on behalf of my wish. He quoted (previous) communal riots against Christians in India, especially in orissa (but not terrorism).  I dont know what to reply.. Whatever he said is true in someway!   If the situation in India was like this, how can anyone convince a foreigner to come to our nation?.

I fear that we are changing our track from secular to hindutva .

Leave the foreigners, consider we Indians..

Some months before, in a pub in mangalore some girls were chosen and beaten by some hindu community members(&  it is video taped to completely ruin the lives of those girls 😦  ).

 What that means? Even a normal Indian has lost his right to live?

People who speak hindutva are starving to dominate others fellow Indians. Hindutva in India is just like taliban in Afghanistan. People have to crop this up in this budding stage. 

The major cause for all this social evils is “religion”..

religion was introduced to transfer barbaric humans in to well cultivated individuals and nowadays it happens vice-versa.

Religion is the reason for bribery..We use to offer bribe like food, gold or money to God for our selfish wishes..       

Religion is the reason for casteism and untouchability. Hinduism categorizes the people into four “Varnas” according to the body part of the divinity from which each group was created and these categories define the group’s social standing. Unfortunately a part of them (esp. Shudras) were made untouchable by the other and it still exists today in some parts of India.

Religion is the reason for riots.. Religion is the reason for the difference between humans.. & Religion is the most deadly weapon that politicians can easily use..

So if you ask this question “Do we need that religion?” to me.  The answer will be “NO”..

& if you ask this question “Do we need God?”.  The answer will be “Yes”… 

Hope I am neither an atheist nor a theist..Its the stance of “Osho” and for me too..

“Belief” – a strong positive word which plays the integral part of everyone’s life.  If there is no belief, no one can live happily.   When I believe that someone is taking care of my life I feel no burden on me, I can sleep happily. Even If I have a lot of enemies I have no need to worry about them, Since always I am having a thought that there is some one to protect me. 

So even I may agree the presence of  God (it will be great if there is someone), but I will not agree the concept of  religions. 

I felt nostalgic yesterday..Its my first feeling of homesickness after a wide long 6 months of isolation.

I didn even worry a lot about that..but when I look in to my unclear future I cant guess when I am going to return back to India. As far as I know, till June 2010 I have to be here to complete my summer intern and the remaining papers. 😦

I came here to change my life enjoy all the fantasies which I dreamt of..but, now i think a normal job with a lovely family is priceless when compared with any other thing..I am forgetting the meaning of love in this electronic world..! 😦

I miss everyone & everything..Mom & family..friends..home food & everything which I loved..

I thought to recall & rejoice my past..I wished to write a personal note on it & here it is!..

So whats about me????how I came in to this world???what did I do until now???

[Allow the thoughts to think of black and white circles..revolving..revolving..revolving..]

> Short back in a friday – May 15, 1987 ( 🙂 not so short) , I was born in Jeyam hospital in purasawalk, Chennai..I was born short after the 7 th wedding anniversary of my parents & I am a product of 7 years of love :)…At that time, I weighed 4.5 Kgs (greater the expected 3.5-4 Kgs) I am li’l bit fatty..but i was not so then 😦 ..

I use to Laugh @ this funny thing: The doctor who attended my mom’s first pregnancy was the second wife of the chief doctor and the one who attended my mom’s second pregnancy was the first wife of the same one 😛

> I was named after my maternal grand father. It a custom in my family to name the first child with paternal ancestor”s name and second child with maternal’s (thats why we have repeated & old names in our community). Always, I am a slow learner, I have heard that I didn’t start to speak until two and half years of age..

I use to Laugh @ this funny thing: My paternal granny use to call me a “dumb boy”

>I had my critical injury at the age of 3. I got a scar on my right eye brow which you can see even now in my face..Actually, I was about to chase up my dad and catch him (while we were playing some game), but i ended up in hitting a sharp steel table which made me in bed for a month..

I use to laugh @ this funny thing: One of my college friend consoled me in this way that “I got something to fill in the identification form”, when i seriously narrated him that tragedy ..

>My first school was Muthiah Alagappa,Kottaiyur.I studied up to 1st grade. and then went to tanjore. During my kindergarden my brother (he was in 6th grade by then) use to do everything for me…  combing my hair, making up my bag, tying up the lace and finally taking me to school & bringing me back home.. (homeworks???..I felt my mom was 🙂 )..

I use to laugh @ this funny thing: I hate to sleep in the afternoon at kindergarden .. I use to make false cries and convince my mom to take me back home when she comes to feed me in the lunch interval..(she was so kind ever..I have always wondered how all those woman in this world got a great character of kindness & affection..)

>In my 1 grade, things changed..I use to have a prolonged fight with my brother over things everytime..where I will get an edge always over him with my parents (since I was just a tiny tot then)..So my parents feared that it might implicate undesired things in him..So my brother was sent to a hostel (run by our own paternal aunt & uncle) in trichy. My parents took me with them to Tanjore were I spent my life from 2-4th grade..

>This life started to be different for me..even i was like a single child at home.. it was really boring without my brother..we started to understand how important we are to each other..during my fourth grade I got another injury….this time its a dog bite…By that time, I use to love only two things – dogs & cars..Always I urged my dad to get a cute little pomarainean..but he never turned up quoting that its difficult to maintain..Eventually I started making love with street dogs 😛 ..and I got a reward on my left palm when I was feeding a dog in a hot sunny afternoon..At that time my dad was out of station, so my mum took me to my aunts home in trichy, where her daughter (my cousin) is a doctor in a local hospital..

I use to laugh @ this funny thing: Still I use to feel the pain around the navel when I think about that.. I had 12 injections at that time 😦

>I was in my aunts home for a week.During that time my brother presented me a tiny little clay car which he did for me, wishing me to recover soon..Everyday he uses to get a toy car for me from his savings..

I use to laugh @ this funny thing: My cousins mock me always to marry one of them as a reciprocation to their help in my recovery. (the deal is good 😉  but they are 10+ years elder than me 😦 )

>I entered in to my 5th grade & my brother was at his 11th..We brothers understood which was matured and which wasn’t my dad brought back my brother to home & we shifted back to Karaikudi then…

These are some memories of my child life..but there are lot more to say…

But when I look in to my past, I feel that my child life is not more interesting than my adult life..Since, adult life was filled with lot many funny things & it also made me very calm and composed..

Let me fill all those things up in the next post..I feel very sleepy now.. this idiotic time runs like a rabbit..its already 3:32 AM 😦 ..good night!

I wish you Happiness and Joy…
And Blessings for the New Year.
I wish you the best of everything…
That you so well deserve.


November 26, 2008 – One of the worst attacks carried out in Mumbai by heartless terrorists which left 200+ people dead and 1000+ injured.


First of all, my condolences to all “innocent” those victims..

I am writing this post in utmost anger and sadness!!! I could not be able to control my emotions.So, I am gonna put everything down here..right before you.. 


As far as i concern, terrorists are not only responsible for these attacks.

Their works are made at ease by inept, corrupt, ineffective, selfish, brutual, mindless politicians at the centre and state. And we can add the bureaucrats later. But they are just puppets. 

And now, because of these inefficient people we have lost hundreds of lives, thousands of dreams, millions of memories and billions of smiles 😦 .. The only sin these victims have committed might be electing these insincere politicians to power & paying the taxes on date.

Sacking of ministers is not going to help the problem..not going to bring the dead back..not going to wipe out the tears of families who have lost their kins..not going to cure the wounds of injured..

We have to find out the reason for lapses. The government was informed many times by RAW, other intelligence sources, government advisories and even by the uneducated fishermen about the probability of attacks on Mumbai. Why did these politicians ignore that? 

I thought that Indian Navy is the sixth powerful naval wing in the world. But they have disproved it within a day 😦

First of all, these politicians have to stop corrupting in arms deals..

Our radars should be powerful to find out alien interference..Our ships should be powerful enough to sink enemy fleet..

The police forces have to deployed with powerful arms and bullet proofs. How can they encounter professional terrorists equipped with Ak-47’s and hand grenades with ordinary pistols or rifles?


Now, we have lost a police encounter specialist Vijay Salaskar. His reports show that he has encountered 75-80 criminals on his duty. 

We have to remodel the entire system.

Congress sucks from the beginning. BJP is also not good enough to compare..We have no options then. So God only knows India’s destiny.. 😦


Now, we have found the real heroes, real martyrs – hats off to those policemen, NSG security guards and all the unknown people who saved the lifes of lot by even sacrificing their’s…

Where is Raj thackerey, a proud Mumbaikar? Is he the first one to go to the spot to repel terrorist attacks or has he hided behind his dog’s home?  Might be..there is no difference between him and his dog..atleast his dog might be sincere.. He and his fanatic followers must know that the complete India has helped ‘Mumbai’ to survive back.. 

Vilasroa Deshmukh, the one who is atmost responsible for all the causes. He has neglected all the warnings. He should had been removed before, as he did a small concern for the farmers when his state hit the largest farmer suicides on the charts. But we have to appreciate him, as he has made his son ritesh deshmukh a good actor.. yeah..thats what every politician has to do in a democratic nation. 😦

Shivraj Patil, another old injured horse in the congress. He should had been removed before. In the past one year, there had been nearly 20-25 bombings in 4-5 different cities in India. What he has done to India as a home minister then? He might have saved money for his grand grand son..yeah..thats what every politician has to do in a democratic nation. 😦

Manmohan Singh, the honorable prime minister should hear his conscience and not of Sonia Gandhi. People are having a lot of respect to him, but he disappoints everyone again and again. Yeah thats what every prime minister has to do in his regime..

These people think that after every bombing there is a political gain. Atleast they can divide the votes of hindus and muslims.. But now we have to show them that we are not hindu’s nor muslims nor jews nor christians nor any other one..but we are Indians..we cant tolerate the death of another human due to terrorism here.  

Think the reason for british imperialism?  the diversity between indian rulers helped the british to bring entire India under their control. Is that gonna happen again?Is terrorism gonna rules us then?

Now the entire world is looking at us. Atleast now, we have to show/prove that the terrorists based on pakistan soil were responsible for these deadly attacks. We have to infiltrate/wipe out terrorists in Pok.

At the end, “WE” have to stand united and evacuate all those social evils who are hindering our progress..

Jai Hind!!!

    Genocide – deliberate & systematic destruction of an ethnic, racial, religious, or national group.

Genocide is a crime under international law.

After world war 2, there had been a wide spread awareness and speculation about genocide. Most of the genocide atrocities have been brought to an end by either international community or the local government. But some genocides are going still.

This post discusses about one of the worst affected communities by genocide – “TAMILS”.

Tamil diaspora is far larger and wider, i have discussed about this in one of my previous posts. Thousands of tamil people migrated towards Burma, Malaysia, Srilanka, Singapora, Middle east and some other parts of the world during the colonial british empire. The amount of migration of tamils to Srilanka is much higher than that of other regions. Geographically, Tamil nadu and Srilanka are of close proximity.

Tamil genocide is said to have started in the year 1983.

I am quoting the series of events that happened in Srilanka from july 25, 1983.

Twenty five years ago on the 25th of July the world watched in horror, the vicious and the violent attacks against the Tamils in Sri Lanka. While the shocking images of burning bodies, gruesome prison massacres and masses of Tamil refugees were flashed across the screen of the world television, the detailed news articles about the murders, rapes and the plight of refugees were started to emerge in the media all over the globe.

The riots began in retaliation for an ambush of an army patrol in Jaffna that left thirteen Sinhalese soldiers dead. The army immediately retaliated by randomly killing a number of innocent civilians in the Jaffna peninsula. This followed by an extensively organised anti-Tamil riot which initially started in Colombo and soon spread to southern part of Sri Lanka where ever the Tamils lived. Sinhalese rioters in Colombo were provided with voters’ lists containing details of names and addresses to enable them to specifically target the Tamil Community. The police, security forces, Buddhist monks and the State Officials turned a blind eye but encouraged the mobs and in some cases they themselves actively took part in the carnage.

Mobs of angry Sinhalese roamed the streets targeting properties and businesses owned by the Tamils. They chased down and beat any vulnerable people they could find. This lasted for several days and claimed the lives of over 3,000 Tamils. Over 50 Tamils political prisoners were butchered by the fellow Sinhalese inmates and the prison guards.This riot created a mass movement of refugees within the island. Over 100, 000 Tamils fled the island and sought refuge in Europe North America, New Zealand, Australia and India.

The government headed by the President Jayewardene refused to condemn these brutal attacks and did not even release a statement until after four days of mayhem.But later in 2004, President Chandrika Kumaratunga made just a token apology to the nation. To this day no one has been prosecuted and no compensation was paid to the families who have lost their loved ones or to the refugees who were forced to abandon their properties and businesses.

This pogrom (form of right directed against particular group of people) was the final blow for the Tamils, who immediately began an armed struggle to exercise their right to self-determination. Thousands of youth joined the Tamil militant organisations, took up arms and fought against the Sinhalese regime. This in turn gave resurgence to the Tamil rebel organisations especially to the Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam (LTTE). This upsurge violence pushed the country into a full scale civil war.

This civil war has already cost hundreds and thousands of lives. The official figure is around 70,000 but recent estimates suggest over 300,000 mostly Tamil lives. Over million Tamils are internally displaced and further a million Tamils have left the island for the safe havens in the West. Riots left a deep psychological scar between the two major ethnic groups

Tamil Tigers were transformed from a hand full of part-timers into a powerful and influential guerrilla movement capable of running over army bases manned by over thousands of professional soldiers. Angry Tamil refugees who settled in the West provided the necessary financial backing to the Tamil Tigers. The relationship between the Tamils and Sinhalese community have since further deteriorated.

In 2002 the newly elected government of Sri Lanka and the Tamil Tigers signed a Ceasefire Agreement (CFA) in February 2002. Both parties held six highly publicised rounds of talks mediated by the Norwegians. The peace talks were abandoned mainly due the pressure from Sinhalese nationalist coalition parties. Although some progress were made, namely Tamil Tigers agreeing to a federal model as an alternative to an independent Tamil state called Eelam.

The current Sri Lankan regime under President Mahinda Rajapaksa is determined to crush the Tamil Tigers. They have pulled out of the CFA in January this year and started a full scale war in the North and East of Sri Lanka. The security forces have made some progress in the East and managed to bring the Eastern province under their control. Rebels withdrew from the East and fortified their northern stronghold. They are fiercely resisting Sri Lankan forces in the Northern Sri Lanka. In a recent battle rebels have proved their strength by inflicting heavy casualties to the security forces in the northern front of Mukamalai.

The human rights situation in Sri Lanka is atrocious. Abductions, disappearances and murders are very common. Sri Lanka has the second highest number of disappearances in the world, ranking only behind Iraq according to the UN.

There is no media freedom any more..The World Association of Newspapers has ranked Sri Lanka as the third most dangerous country in the world for media workers. (Iraq and Somalia are ranked 1 and 2 respectively.

The Srilanka government is bombing up Tamil civilian areas as a part of ethnic cleansing.  The Srilankan government can never refuse this claim. Since on 14-august-2006, 61 tamil innocent girls were killed by an air raid by Srilankan airforce (SLA). But i dont know i how they still claim that it is a rebel LTTE camp. There are lot many incidents heart pounding like this.

 Just consider that single incident. SLA has not only killed 61 girls, they have killed 61 hearts, hundreds of memories and thousands of  dreams. Those girls were between 16-18 years of age, how can they be a part of a threatening guerrilla group?  

It can be any war or a riot, the general principle is to leave women and children “unaffected”.  

However this pogrom and the ongoing civil war have made the world to acknowledge that the Tamils have legitimate grievances in Sri Lanka.

 The western powers made a separate state (Israel) for jews after second world war in 1948. Since the jewish community lost more than 60% of its population due to atrocities commited by Hitler’s Nazi Army.

The condition is the same here. I dont know why still the western powers refuse to mediate this problem. India is still remaining silent on this issue. The politicians in India are avenging the innocent tamils for their personal reasons ( delibrately, I mean Sonia Gandhi). I accept that Rajiv was killed by a terrorist group, it is condemnable. But how can all the ethnic tamil people bear the cause. The gulf between Sinhalese and Tamil communities is ever widening by the day. Unless the Tamil grievances are addressed by the majority government there will be no end to the violence in Sri Lanka. If no one is going to interfere in this matter and bring out peace, I fear that the tamil community will be slashed out in lanka after 20 years. 😦  Only our children will be learning about ethnic tamils in Srilanka through history books. 😦